How to Stop Elderly Parents From Driving

Donna Nichols • December 29, 2020

One of the hardest conversations to have: telling an aging loved one it’s time to stop driving 

First of all, how do you know it’s time for them to stop driving?

Let’s take a look at some of the signs.

Take a few rides with them and observe their mannerisms and reaction times.

  • Are they easily distracted while driving?
  • Are they driving too fast or too slow?
  • Are they cutting corners too sharp?
  • Are they having difficulty changing lanes?
  • Do you notice any new scrapes or dents on the vehicle?

These are some early signs that it may be time for your loved one to quit driving, but how do you tell your mom or dad they can no longer drive?

Yikes!! Here’s the hard part, right?

Just remember, they have been driving for a lifetime and giving it up means losing their independence. It doesn’t have to be so hard, just start out slowly and bring to their attention little details calmly and patiently.

I tell you to take a ride with them because you need to know the facts for yourself, don’t rely on what others tell you, they could be basing their remarks off of one circumstance.

Before you approach the subject, make sure you have an alternative plan. Research other transportation options and show them they can still get around town, to the doctor’s office, etc.

For more information about this, read our blog, Senior Transportation Options.

How to stop elderly parents from driving

There are many delivery services now who will deliver groceries and medications. Maybe one of their neighbors would take them to run errands one day a week. Check into other options before approaching the subject.

Be sympathetic, after all, you’re asking them to give up a large part of their lifestyle. Approach the subject carefully and keep your emotions under control. Your loved one may be angry or act hostile toward you, but remain calm while speaking to them about giving up driving.

They are not going to agree with you the first time you have this conversation. You may have to speak to them several times, and suggest they take a driving test or have their vision checked. Perhaps if a professional tells them they are not able to drive any longer, they will be more apt to listen.

Remind them of the consequences that could happen if they continue to drive, but speak to them calmly. Remind them someone could get seriously hurt and maybe even die if they have an accident. Also, point out that they couldn’t handle the affects of a car accident either. It’s hard enough to recover from a fall; can you imagine a car accident?

Make sure you stay on track with the conversation, don’t go off on another topic, and stick to the point of them not driving. They may try to change the subject because it is something they don’t want to hear, but stick to the subject!

So, how do you tell your aging loved one is time to stop driving? Calmly and with patience, remember you are telling them they can no longer do the one thing that gives them the last bit of freedom they have.

If you need help or encouragement as a Caregiver give us a call at  386-847-2322  or check out our  Caregiver Support Group. Our  Senior Advisors  are here to walk with you through this journey.

Benefits of Assisted Living

By Donna Nichols • May 2, 2025
Assisted living has many benefits, especially for older adults or people needing help with daily activities but not requiring full-time medical care. Here's a quick breakdown: Independence and support Residents get to maintain a level of independence while having access to help with things like: Bathing, dressing, or grooming Medication management Meal preparation So they still have freedom without the stress of handling everything alone. Access to care Staff is usually available 24/7, and while it’s not a nursing home, many places have nurses or aides on hand for basic health needs, depending on their licensure. It’s a safety net in case anything happens. Meals & housekeeping Daily meals, cleaning, laundry, and other chores are usually included, which reduces stress and gives you more time to enjoy life. Social life Assisted living communities often have activities, group outings, and common areas, which can help prevent loneliness and boost mental health. Safety & security These places are designed with safety in mind, such as grab bars, emergency call systems, and accessible layouts. Plus, knowing someone’s always nearby gives peace of mind. Peace of mind (for families, too) Families often feel relieved knowing their loved one is in a supportive environment where help is readily available. As you can see, assisted living has many benefits. If you feel it is unsafe for you or your loved one to live alone, please consider assisted living. It will give you peace of mind and them the safety and security they require.  If you or a loved one is ready to move to assisted living, please call us at 386-847-2322. We are experts in senior care.

What’s in Your Box?

By Donna Nichols • April 8, 2025
What does that mean? It means what’s important to you. What do you want to take with you should you leave your home and move to an assisted living community? Assisted living apartments typically range from 500 to 900 square feet, so if you come from a home that is 2,000 square feet, you will be losing a significant amount of square footage. What’s important to me may not be important to you; it differs for everyone. You’ll want to balance practical needs with personal comforts when thinking about what to bring. Here's a breakdown of what might be in your box and what to consider taking with you: When preparing to move into an assisted living community, the "box" is a metaphor for the essentials or comforts you’re packing to make the space your own. Here’s what could go in that box: Personal Essentials: Clothing: Comfortable, easy-to-wear clothes, including shoes that are safe for walking (like non-slip footwear). Toiletries: Toothbrush, toothpaste, soap, shampoo, lotion, and other personal hygiene items. Medications: A well-organized container for daily meds (check with staff for any medication regulations). Comforting Personal Items: Photographs: Family pictures, old albums, or framed photos of pets can help create a homier feel. Favorite Books or Magazines: If you love to read, packing a few favorite books or magazines can be comforting. Blankets or Throw Pillows: Soft, cozy items that remind you of home. Technology: Cell phone or tablet: Stay in touch with family and friends. If needed, a simple phone with larger buttons might be helpful. Charger and headphones: Keep your devices powered up and ready for entertainment or communication. Entertainment & Hobbies: Crafts, puzzles, or knitting: Hobbies like knitting, crocheting, or painting can offer a good mental boost. Music: A playlist or a device with your favorite tunes. Maybe even a small portable speaker. Documents: Important papers: Health documents, insurance information, and personal identification should always be within easy reach. Safety Items: Walkers or canes: If you use mobility aids, don't forget these items. Glasses and Hearing Aids: Any vision or hearing accessories you rely on to help with daily life. What would you take with you? When moving into an assisted living community, you may not have the space for everything you own, so bringing only the most meaningful and necessary items is important. Here's a breakdown of what to take with you: Personal Care and Health Items: Your medications, medical devices (like CPAP machines), and other health-related essentials should come. Items like hearing aids, glasses, and dentures are crucial to have on hand. Don’t forget a first aid kit with basic items like band-aids, antiseptic wipes, and a thermometer. Bedding and Furniture: Sheets, blankets, and pillows that are soft and familiar. If allowed, take small, comfortable furniture like a favorite chair or nightstand. Decorative Touches: Personal touches such as a family photo frame, a small vase, or your favorite artwork can make a new space feel welcoming. Consider a small rug to help make the room feel warmer and more comfortable. Clothing: Comfortable clothing that suits the climate where you’ll be living. Slippers and non-slip shoes are very important for safety and comfort. Seasonal clothing: Depending on the time of year, pack sweaters, jackets, hats, or lighter clothes. Technology: Smartphone or tablet for keeping in touch with family and friends. A Kindle or e-reader could be a great option if you like to read but want to save space. Tangible Keepsakes: A small heirloom, a favorite book, or a memory box filled with meaningful trinkets can bring emotional comfort in a new place. Food & Kitchen Tools (if allowed): Some assisted living communities may allow you to have a few personal items for snacks, like a mini fridge or microwave in your room. Favorite snacks or special foods you enjoy might be comforting to have on hand. Considerations for Your New Space Each assisted living community has its own rules and space limitations, so it’s a good idea to ask what you can bring and what is already provided. Many communities offer furniture, housekeeping, and even activities, so your primary focus may be personalizing your space with items that truly bring you joy and comfort. Ultimately, the most important things to take will help you feel settled, safe, and supported in this new chapter of your life. What’s in your box for this kind of move? Are there any personal items you would want to make sure are packed?

Live in the Now

By Shar Barron • April 1, 2025
Why do we wait? Now is here. Buy the pretty flowers, eat the cake, call that old friend, and tell “your person” you love them. I see couples staring at their phones in restaurants instead of each other, and it saddens me. My husband is gone, and oh, how I’d love to sit and stare at him, talk to him over a meal. I used to go home and hear, “How was your day?” Now, I hear only silence. I didn’t miss his voice until it was no more. What I wouldn’t give to hear it again. Living in the now means you look forward to that greeting or sharing that meal. Who can I tell my secrets to? Who will never tell another soul? My guy was my confidant, and I miss that so much! I have no one to be silly with or cry with; all that is gone forever. You need to breathe. Sometimes, that little breath gives you time to remember the good things. Instead of rushing around and trying to do so much… Today is a gift. That gift is now, and if you take a breath… Sometimes, you realize how blessed you are. Look up at the sky, listen to the birds chirp, and watch the sun rise and set… Just take that moment, take that breath, and enjoy the now. If you think of someone, don’t hesitate to call them. If you want to go somewhere, don’t wait. The best advice that can be given is to simply breathe and recognize that this moment is the most important part of your day. The NOW matters. You realize it too late most of the time. Value the NOW. Make the NOW matter! Embrace the precious little moments. Savor the nonsensical words. The NOW is priceless; realize it before you don’t have someone to share it with. Live in the NOW before it’s gone.  God gave you the gift of NOW - what a priceless treasure. Grab it and enjoy those NOW moments. There are so many, and those memories are baked into your bones to treasure forever.
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